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Verified Tanker [EU]
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Status Updates posted by orzel286

  1. One thing that pissed me off during my latest visit to the dentist: doc and the assistant started talking about games and I couldn't join in...

  2. Best highlight of Dutch GP:

    >James: Valtteri, it's James, abort the fastest lap attempt.

    >Valtteri: *chad No.*

    >posts fastest lap

    >"To whom it may concern: Fuck you."

    >Lewis forced to pit

    >*Toto desk smashing intensifies*

    This is totally what happened and you won't convince me otherwise.

    Also: Kubica in front of both Williams', which went back where they belong, lol.

  3. Kimi Raikkonen is going to retire at the end of this season. Sad BWOAH noises, at least he'll finally have his drink.

  4. Me, December 19, 2015, in a status update regarding the force awakens:

    I guess I'll just pretend that it never happened and that eu is still canon. FU disney.

    Where are we now: the high republic, Han Solo clone venturing on a vessel named The Vessel. With a fucking rock as a navigator.

    Honestly, I wanted to make some pun about rock or stone, but I'm too dead inside at this point.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. orzel286


      Profile->see my activity->status updates, on the left. Replies were bugged for me, might be browser issue.

      It was weird going through them, trying to hide my degeneracy with all the saltiness and then basically "eh, don't care anymore, I'll just worship anime feet in the open".

    3. lavawing


      I was going through them to try and determine at what point in time I came out as a weeb.

      Then I saw my first status update and realised it was a Fate/Zero poast :neko:

    4. orzel286


      The Priest smiles.

  5. youtube: "controversial" opinions, history, some news are not kid- and advertiser-friendly, get fucked.

    also youtube: naked yoga? perfectly fine.

    5/10, solid wank, had much better tho.

  6. So, uh, after my current phone (which I'll name later) got a bit squished and display started leaking, using emulator for almost 2 years now, writing a mobile app for a school project some time ago... I finally bought my first smartphone. Used, but factory new after servicing and still on warranty, Redmi Note 7. Don't really expect miracles from it, just hoping it'll run fgo and azur lane at any fps. Just.. Need to contact my provider to cut my ANCIENT sim card into nano sim (I don't feel confident doing it myself), or get a replacement.

    So, what was I using until now?



    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. ZXrage


      Yeah I was crushed, I loved it so much I even got the battery replaced a few months before I dropped it

    3. punishersal


      I accidentally bumped heating radiator(not the modern ones, soviet style one) into the screen while helping brother to get it out his gf apartment. Just as ZXRage, I loved mine as well. I remember one time when I put many stickers on it because of boredom and then remove them immediatelly. A part of paper and glue didnt come off instantly, soI put that thing in water for glue to come off. Manual said that it had IP 58 or something and it truly did have.

    4. orzel286



      I accidentally bumped heating radiator(not the modern ones, soviet style one)

      Oh, yes, I also got to bump one of these. With the back of my head, when I was 5 or 6 yo. No stitches, luckily.

  7. Do I edit my latest post or can I bump my absolutely blessed and wholesome thread? @mods

    1. PityFool


      you can bump it friend

    2. orzel286


      Oh, nice, thanks!

  8. Coming back from work and not feeling dead feels great.

  9. New job, lul. Hopefully more time for gacha!

    1. Tman450
    2. mistervanni


      goodluck in your next endeavour then :D

    3. orzel286


      No more furnaces!

  10. Recruiters see unemployed person: Sleep.

    Recruiters see employed person: REAL SHIT

    Every time. Can someone explain this?

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Balthazars


      It's a form of incumbency bias. Potential employers have a bias towards people who are currently employed, because the default proposition is that if you currently hold onto a job, you must be capable of performing that job to a certain extent, which means you should then be able to do the job that they want you to do. On the flip side, if you do not have a job, the default proposition is that there must be a reason that you do not have a job, which means that you may not be able to do the job that they want you to do. Also similar to another form of incumbency bias, which is the "we want someone with experience, but you have no experience, even though everyone starts without experience". Yes, this type of bias is pretty damned stupid, but it is especially prominent among 'professional recruiters' (an awful concept to begin with) who churn through hundreds, if not thousands of potential applicants to fill a handful of positions.

    3. Raj


      why do they keep messaging me then? I have been a NEET for years now.

    4. CandyVanMan


      They might assume someone is unemployed for a reason, it's kinda cruel, but at the same time logical. 
      Someone who's employed would seem like the safer bet, as they are most likely somewhat competent.

  11. Hiryuus feet are the best in the world!





    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. lavawing


      @orzel286 you could try putting them in stacked comments so they don't tick nonweebs off (they do exist, however few)

    3. orzel286


      Weeb oppression, smh. :v

      I'll do that for the future updates.

    4. FavreFan4ever


      3 hours ago, orzel286 said:

      Weeb oppression, smh. :v

      I'll do that for the future updates.

      Or make a thread? Then the ppl who want to see this stuff can find it easier, and the people who don't want to see it can avoid it easier.

  12. Ooooo, cute hamster, and she'll prote... Wait, wdym "just kidding"?  That's it, you're last in the leveling queue! :v


    Essex entered "no bullying Essex" zone, 10/10, would headpat.


    Ok, so that's everyone from the rate up... Except the Big Sleepy Floof. I did 100 builds, I'm almost out of coins, idk if I'll make it :cri:


    I also have an announcement.

    After a thorough study, I have determined that first ascension Skadi is the best Skadi. The combination of pantyhose, high heels and her icy personality, resulted in off the charts "use me as footstool, please" readings. The measuring equipment exploded.

    This concludes todays Weeb Report!

  13. >n-no, you can't talk lewd things about fictional characters you filthy degenerate!

    Me: haha, big tiddy aircraft carriers go brrrrrrrrrr



    Hm, do they work best as a pair, like Akagi and Kaga? Need to look at their skills...


    Who's on the yandere squad anyway? Dido, Akagi, Taihou and Roon? Almost assembled then, wooooooooooooooo!

    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. Haswell


      You're gonna give me an aneurysm. :doge: 

    3. orzel286


      Why would I want to give you an aneurysm? You're my #1 target for conversion... :panting:

    4. Haswell
  14. Me: damn, Shangri-La showing her foot in the loading screen is 10/10, would LICC, hope I get her soon...

    AL Gacha: I got you fam.


    Got Big Tiddy Centaur as well :disco:


    Munition ship? What? Hm, nice thighs...


    Soryuu retrofit has some LONK LEGS and according to Hiryuu her feet are the best in the world... But I bet Hiryuu herself would taste at least just as good. And she's next in line for retro, yay!

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. KruggWulf


      I have no idea what the actual fuck y'all are talking about but why are you butthurt.

    3. orzel286


      Don't ask me, I have no clue either.

    4. lavawing


      @KruggWulf orzel's degeneracy disturbed Favre



    Holy shit, I can't believe I got him, with my last 3 sq as well. I think I jizzed my pants.

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. echo9835


      The first 4 are really funny. They did ruin the whole fate franchise for me tho.

    3. orzel286


      Well, the first anime kinda killed the franchise for me XD Gotta say tho, Prisma Illya is really nice, definately worth watching.

    4. MagicalFlyingFox


      Fate Zero, Unlimited Budget Works and Heavens Feel. All worth watching. FATE/DEEN :eww:

  16. WEEB News!

    It's confirmed, Haato is no more, it's Haachama now! @MagicalFlyingFox I gotta say, her Polish pronunciation was really nice XD Haachamachama translating into "You're crazy" in half of the languages was the most accurate google translation I've ever seen XD


    Still. No. WAVER! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA GACHA PLS! T_T Saving for next year, I think there's memelin rate-up during summer4? Got flat drinking oni at least.



    I don't like the "clear sp3 X times" type of events, they're not comfy at all. And I'm 327/330 port slots anyway, oof. Guilds 2.0 for more ports slots when? T_T


    Got her from daily roll, I think I got a wolfpack now.


    Those legs, nnnnnice.


    1. Show previous comments  9 more
    2. HowitzerBlitzer
    3. MagicalFlyingFox


      Getting what you want should be a given. The real question is, how many boxes are you going to open? 30? 40? 50?

    4. orzel286


      10 is the absolute minimum, other than that I don't have a specific number in mind, so the answer is "as many as I can" I guess.

  17. youtube: pssssssst! hey, I heard you like gun channels!

    me: huh? yeah, sort of...

    yt: ever seen a 7yo dual wielding and magdumping pistols? WITNESS!


    me: das good shit

    1. Rexxie


      go watch femboy fishing :neko:

    2. orzel286


      I'm not really into femboys. Astolfo being pretty much the only exception (I'm not counting D'Eon as femboy, it's a true mystery) :v

  18. Came back home, left sweaty (I didn't think it's still this hot) t-shirt on the floor.

    One of my cats: ahhhhhhhhhh yes, this shit's better than catnip, thanks brooooo. *proceeds to roll in and sniff stinky shirt*

    Pets really take after their owners, don't they? Because I'd do the same with Haachama's stinky socks.

    (no bulli pls)

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. orzel286


      Really? I have stronger than normal pheromones? XD Also, that's MY territory, I'm the alpha here and both my cats follow me like dogs.

    3. Private_Miros


      Everyone has when they sweat more than normal. Cats are solitary animals and know no alpha. Other animals on their territory are merely tolerated to one or the other extent.

    4. orzel286


      Oh trust me, I'm the alpha here, Papa Orzel was securing his position ever since they were small and now they're well behaved cats, they know if they do something bad, the justice will be swift and completely unavoidable.

      Which reminds me of a certain Wolf being below her cat in the hierarchy....



  19. WEEB TIME!

    Big Tiddy BB, I bully her with Hood :D Finally FdG grinding backline is pretty much complete... I only miss Zeppy.


    >haha nice story with that drawing


    >both in the event and irl they couldn't help



    Ah, another cutie! Awwwwww, she's so sweet my diabetes intensified!


  20. I can't believe I got them both



    No sq left, oof.

    Wishing well in Azur Lane, picked Ping Hai (again) and Sirius (because of lewds). First pull:


    and still no Ping, gacha pls. Also: BISMARCK IS COMING! Didn't have a chance to get her, I joined after her event, pls send luck.

    1. MagicalFlyingFox


      I got MHXX and Summer Medb. No BB summer.


      Bring on the lottery. Gilfest now PLS!

      I need QP and blazes.

    2. orzel286


      I need caster gems, giant's rings, aurora steel and ice crystals I guess.



      Over a year of trying to get her. Only Yat Sen remains.

      Got Smol Lena as well.


    3. MagicalFlyingFox


      Bar soap hell.................................................

  21. Imagine getting over 100k subs before your debut.


    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. orzel286


      Haachama took over, Haato is in the backseat XD I think she'll soon corrupt everyone from the 5th gen. Botan lewds review soon? YES!

    3. Assassin7


      My friend is fanboying all over Botan...


      He also donated to Watame and was planning on doing a $100CDN donation to her but I convinced him out of it lmao. 

    4. orzel286


      >My friend is fanboying all over Botan...

      Totally understandable.


      Poor Watamelon, she'll get eaten by Adidas Lion. I'd eat her too tbh :v


  22. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZoSb9ja5AU

    Gun Jesus in the next John Wick? Yes, please!


    1. j_galt


      Quick show of hands - how any fans of Forgotten Weapons here?

    2. orzel286


      <- Here's one :DEver since his Vis video I think.

  23. Getting a cold mid-summer is almost like getting an STD from wanking. It's beyond wrong.

    1. Show previous comments  7 more
    2. orzel286


      A yoghurt or a "yoghurt"? :doge:

    3. hazzgar


      Ironically literally a yoghurt. Milk products neutralize capsaicin. 

    4. orzel286


      The other kind of "yoghurt" might help as well, you never know!

  24. >everyone is hot for Astolfo

    >while this cutie gets completely overlooked



    New botes in AL WOOOOOOOOOOOOO


    She small, and she thicc


    OMG her skills, best support carrier confirmed? F Unicorn


    Eh, I guess? Cruiser gun vs low efficiency dive bomber squadron... Hm.




    Huh? HUH? HUUUUUH?

    And after some limit-braking, retrofitting, getting down to ~305 slots used I somehow ended up with 317/320 again. DAMN BULLINS BULLING ME!

    1. HowitzerBlitzer


      Someone explain this post to me, I don't even know what cartoons kids watch these days.

    2. orzel286



      First part: Fate franchise, screenshot taken from mobile game Fate Grand Order. Basically, as I said, everyone is hot for Astolfo. He kinda exploded in popularity after Fate/Apocrypha got anime adaptation. Meanwhile, D'eon gets overlooked, despite, uh, being a more enigmatic... Surprise. And is way more cute imo.

      Second part: another mobile game, Azur Lane: bet your in-game currencies on getting the waifuboats that you want, and then send them through ww2-like hell with a bit of a twist. Fun to play, generous gacha, (I'm 100% f2p for now and keep on getting pretty much everyone I want). Why do I post my GETs? Well, why not? Since they are so



    3. HowitzerBlitzer


      Ah, makes sense.

      A little tricky sometimes though because you can't tell who's a guy and who's a girl anymore xd

  25. Hm, so every time I get something new from gacha I get a fair bit of lag before the animation starts playing (before the first one if 10-roll). Which would suggest that the game gets back info about what you get first and then displays it in random order(?) or with a "yup, it's a gold card after all" variable, for example:


    Got her from a ticket, and it was a 3* assasin card at first, then started changing.

    The more you know...

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