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Garbad

Overlord seeks Minions for Henious Pub Abuse

  

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  1. 1. Who is more evil?



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Ok, so I have no friends.  Worse, I have no one to internet tank platoon with.  I end up rage solopubbing for lack of people to platoon with.  This has to stop -- if not, I will die of a heart attack before I'm 40.  Accordingly, I am recruiting minions, underlings, and so on to serve as my personal meat shields.  I require:

 

- NA east coast time zones (~6-8 PM EST generally)

- Tier 5-10, especially 7-9.

- Own a 112, IS-6, or KV-5 and have an inordinate love of playing it as I play my T-34-3

- No shitlords.  Have appropriate gear, crew, ammo, etc on a reasonable level.  You don't have to spam gold but don't be a retard shitter in stock tanks, either.

- Are willing to track opponents, take hits, and scout for me as I pad stats.  Once I die, you have to carry the team so we never lose.  Any failure of me to get great stats and win will be your fault.

- Be willing to play with assorted NA unicums, some more...socially awkward....than others

- Must enjoy basking in my greatness, winning, and ranting

 

This isn't a training platoon or a social platoon, its a call to find new, quality people to platoon with.  I'm not here to carry people, help you with your shit tank grinds, or to teach you.  I just want to relax and win some tank games and win without breaking my back every damn game.  I am not going to set a lower bound of who I will play with, but if you aren't playing on a high level you will probably be out of place.  And understand me -- I consider most unicums to be shitlords.  But I'll give most people a shot.

 

P.S.  NO FUCKING CANCERFAGS

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I have a dream that one day, the Super Pershing will get the respect it deserves as a preferential 8 anchor.

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That day may not be today, however.

Feel free to spam me invites. I play all those tiers, although I'm usually on around 9:30 PM Eastern.

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Just getting back into the game and playing a bit scrubby as I adjust to the map changes and meta but...

 

* Strong in tiers 7-9.

* I'll track and take hits as the situation dictates in order to preserve the operational ability of the platoon.

* When I do platoon I prefer to use voice comms.

* I despise and actively hunt arty whenever possible, sometimes to a fault.

* I am calm, cool, and even headed when playing.  Can deal with sperg rage as needed.

 

I don't platoon much and am looking for someone I may 'click' with ( no not that kind of clicking).

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Sure, sounds fun - spam invites if you feel i'm up to your standards.  I'm on during those times reasonably often, and have a selection of sexy tanks in those tiers.  Along with my "sparkling" personality - Otis knows what i'm talking about here...

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Do what I do; use the lesser xIMBOners as inert and talentless meatshields allowing me to get all the damages.

While the only pref-VIII I have is the FCT 50t, I love me some VII-IX and will happily potato everywhere for you. I am also on around 6pm EST especially on the weekends.

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Do what I do; use the lesser xIMBOners as inert and talentless meatshields allowing me to get all the damages.

While the only pref-VIII I have is the FCT 50t, I love me some VII-IX and will happily potato everywhere for you. I am also on around 6pm EST especially on the weekends.

 

 

All the non-Limbo clans exist to provide us with meatshields.

 

@ Garbad - I am British and have sexy wit & accent. I also own a 112, KV5 & IS6. I prefer my Type 59, which I think I do better in.

 

I am usually on Fridays/Saturdays. Feel free to add me if you want to try me out. I consider myself quite the teammate, I always get frustrated platooning with people who are quite quiet and don't coordinate or call out targets. I was brawling a 113 and got too focused to see a JPE100 to whit the toonmates reply was 'Oh sorry I thought you noticed him, I was shooting him though!' like..damn please assume I haven't, I'd prefer to not take 1k hp and keep on the carry. Obviously my fault I should constantly be hyper-aware but that's why I toon, constantly trying to carry pubtard teams can be tiresome and any net you get with tooning makes the game measurebly more enjoyable.

 

Are you quite vocal with your toon? Or do you just silently sit there, telepathically communicating with the other unicums about your plans?

 

Also more than happy to take hits, if necessary to win the game mind. I even saved a pubbie once, he even thanked me. I consider it the highest compliment a human being can ever receive, being thanked by a pubbie.

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Sometimes I'm tempted to click accept on one of your invites, then I realize how hard it would be to play while having an orgasm.

Time to make a Garbadic challenge thread about the effects of orgasm on winrate

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Sometimes I'm tempted to click accept on one of your invites, then I realize how hard it would be to play while having an orgasm.

If Stoya can read a book while having one, you ought to be able to carry Garbad after he dies to clicker shitlords in the first 3 minutes of the game while having one.

 

 

 

 

(Also, I'll give it a go in my IS-6 Garbad)

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I'm always up to get spammed invites if I'm gud enough.

First pubbie platoon successful!  Zequill, goon, and I platooned in tier 8s...and got two tier 10 games with mass blacks vs mass blues two games in a row.  -_-

One had bulba shitters farming us for wn8.  My asshole puckered.

 

It was ok after that.

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Kind of surprised Garbad has trouble finding toonies. Add me if my overall doesn't make you puke.

 

Which brings up my question. In comparison to other top players, do you rage as hard or as often as they do? You know, where the platoon does 12k damage and you still lost so they flame each other for 5 minutes until someone leaves the platoon butthurt.

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Which brings up my question. In comparison to other top players, do you rage as hard or as often as they do? You know, where the platoon does 12k damage and you still lost so they flame each other for 5 minutes until someone leaves the platoon butthurt.

I'll let my groupies respond to this.  Amanda?

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Which brings up my question. In comparison to other top players, do you rage as hard or as often as they do? You know, where the platoon does 12k damage and you still lost so they flame each other for 5 minutes until someone leaves the platoon butthurt.

To my knowledge, this is the only way to properly conduct an elitist platoon.

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Which brings up my question. In comparison to other top players, do you rage as hard or as often as they do? You know, where the platoon does 12k damage and you still lost so they flame each other for 5 minutes until someone leaves the platoon butthurt.

 

I'll let my groupies respond to this.  Amanda?

 

Nope, mostly pretty chill until Garbad runs his 34-3

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