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Big1Jake

Rules of the WoT

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Repost of this thread: http://forum.worldoftanks.com/index.php?/topic/254412-rules-of-the-wot/ . My 5k game post of infinite tank wisdomses. I can do that, right? :P

 

 

So I've been lurking around these forums for awhile now, and having reached 5k games I thought it was time to finally do something productive. Following that, I decided to create a list of ~50 rules to explain exactly how WoT and its community appears to function.

  • On The Forums:

1. Everything belongs in general discussion. EVERYTHING.
2. SerB is watching. Always.
3. Russian bias.
4. ^not really (but don't tell them.)
5. For your own sake, 'poast' is not a mispelling. Pull up a tab and Google 'vernacular'.
6. All big clans 'whoard teh golds'.
7. All small clans are scrubs.
8. If stats < green point is invalid.
8. (Alternate) If stats > blue, point is invalid.
8. (Alternate 2) If stats = green, wait, who are you again?
9. Your post has been judged before it's even been read.
10. Clan wars will always be in beta.
          10-1. Assuming it's even up.
11. Don't poast in CR/D, just don't.
          11-1. STOP POASTING IN CR/D.
12. The Ratte has not, is not, and will not EVER come - stahp asking.
13. If you don't understand what someone's saying - troll.
14. If you don't understand what someone's saying - you're being trolled.
15. The second German TD line is a lie propagated by the communists that will start off OP and ultimately be nerfed into the ground.
          15-1. Assuming this hasn't already happened in supertesting.

  • On The Game:

16. Carry harder.
17. CARRY HARDER.
          17-1. You lost with top damage and XP? NOT HARD ENOUGH.
18. The greatest of plays can result in failure.
19. The greatest of failures can result in victory.
20. Just when you think one fail is game-ending, another is right around the corner.
21. There is only 'I' in team - it's actually spelt IIII.
22. Your ally will always find a way to place himself between your gun and the enemy.
          22-1. Unless you are at one-shottable health, in which case allies are nowhere to be found.
23. Defeat shall be snatched from the jaws of the most assured victories.
24. The rock is never big enough.
25. Why yes, scouts do see more than two tiers above their own.
26. There is no such thing as overestimation of the enemy.
27. There is no such thing as underestimation of your team.
28. That magical thing on the bottom right of your screen is called a minimap - USE IT.
29. A T-50-2 is the single most dangerous tank on the enemy team.
          29-1. Even at Tier 9.
          29-2. ESPECIALLY AT TIER 10.
30. Why no, Mr. *, you can not shoot me if I track you on top of a hill.
          30-1. * = Russian.
          30-2. * = German
          30-3. * = British
          30-4. * = Chinese
          30-5. * = French
          30-6. * = Pretty much everything not American.
31. Shoot moar gold. It's never enough.
32. Why no, your Tiger is not an impennable doom tank.
33. Your losses will always be your best damage / XP games.
34. Your x2's will always be your worst damage / XP games.
35. * are/is your friend.
          35-1. * = Mods.
          35-2. * = Consumables.
          35-3. * = Equipment.
          35-4. * = Actually reading the thread & OP before replying.
          35-5. * = Server-side reticle.
          35-6. * = Knowledge of weakspots.
          35-7. * = Gold rounds.
          35-8. No, not using them does not save you money - it costs you money.
          35-9. Not using them only hinders your team and yourself.
36. Capfast.
37. Platoons are OP.
          37-1. But you can do it too, so stop whining and get some friends.

  • On The Inherent Nature of Tanks:

38. Everything is OP.
          38-1. Except the Type 59.
          38-2. ESPECIALLY THE TYPE 59.
39. The most blatantly broken tanks and mechanics will be ignored.
40. The nerf will come for all things in the end.
41. Soft-stats exist; FIGHT THE POWER.
42. REMOVE_*_FROM_THE_GAME
          42-1. Garbad's Axiom: * = ARTY
          42-2. Scrubs' Axiom: * = GARBAD
          42-3. Everyone Else: *sigh*
43. Power creep is real, and you're next.
          43-1. See Tier X Brit TD.
          43-2. lolnotreally
44. Arty is forever.
45. Arty is the great equalizer.
46. Win%/WN#/EFF may not be an absolute reflection of skill, but both are highly correlated and ignoring this correlation removes all of your credibility as a po(a)ster and a player.
47. Purple is a color to fear.
          47-1. It means unicum.
          47-2. It's also the color of Samuel Jackson's lightsaber.
48. All of the above rules are absolute.
49. All of the above rules are not to be taken seriously, except for 48.
50. At the end of the day, tanks is tanks, life is life, and for better or worse, it continues.



tl;dr: See 35-4.

 

 

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Gonna hijack your thread a lil' bit because I had a similar thread repost from my thread explaining where the server went down :
 

Why did the server go down :
 
1. Someone tripped on the server power cable.
 
2. The hamsters got tired.
 
3. Wargaming is telling you to go outside.
 
4. The world is ending.
 
5. Because fuck you thats why.
 
6. The server didn't go down..it was in your head.
 
7. It's past your bedtime.
 
8. Wargaming has milked you dry,and has now activated self destruct mode.
 
9. Because everyone loves trolling from time to time.
 
10.Because they wanted me to type this list out.
 
11.Because you're a sinner and you will not join jesus in heaven.
 
12.Because you made them sad :c
 
13.Someone in the office spilled coffee on the server.
 
14.A cat sat on it and borked it.
 
15.Because of german fanboys.
 
16.A dev got a neg rep,boohoo.
 
17.MWO is sabotaging WG,and they are having epic office warfare,too epic for the server to handle.
 
18.Because oldfarts wouldn't stop talking about MWO.
 
19.Because oldfarts.
 
20.Because kids.
 
21.Because oldfarts.
 
22.Because kids.
 
23.Because this thread,you must read it.
 
24.Because Sneakybugger did something...Sneaky. *wink wink notch notch cough cough*
 
25.Because I didn't get +'repped ;c
 
26.Because you didn't gib goldz to Nisae
 
27.Weaboofaggits
 
28.Because you're bad at internet tanks and you should feel bad.
 
29.Because hetzers gonna hetz.
 
30.Too much BS.
 
31.Russian Bi-comment removed-
 
32.Because the server went down,thats why.
 
33.Because they want me to play world of tanks sea to even up the population...scumbagss!!1!
 
34.Rule #34,no exceptions.
 
35.NA Server is having her period menstruation,woe be on her.
 
36.Buy more gold,gold fixes all world problems,including world hunger,poverty and stupidi- naw,impossible.
 
37.Because I must make a surprise guest appearance in a certain not so seclusive,seclusive and not so shady,shady WoT event that may or may not be near my house for maybe or maybe not a reason.
 
38.Because I'm making this list.
 
39.THEY KNOW.
 
38.Becaus- I'm tired this is gonna be my last.
 
39.Because I lied.
 
40.We know you have alt accounts
 
41.Because the server borked.
 
42.Rule one about Russian Bi
 
43.Do not talk about Russian B
 
44.GOD DAMMIT STOP DOING THAT
 
45.Because you don't get a prize for reading this far in.
 
46.Because P.U.T.T's
 
47.Because we can't have nice things
 
48.Because you must take this seriously,and this thread is in no way a joke...nope,not at all...right?
 
49.Because the server went down.
 
50.Just so you know why~
 
Last.You deserve a cookie for watching this far,you deserve one even if you skipped to the end anyway
 
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47. Purple is a color to fear.

          47-1. It means unicum.

          47-2. It's also the color of Samuel Jackson's lightsaber.

 

I released the most ridiculous laugh

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