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The "Shit Happens" Thread

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LOL REST IN PEPPERONIS YOU'RE FUCKED MATE NICE KNOWING YA

 

Im kidding.. I'll just provide you with some helpful hints!

 

PityFool's Survival Guide to South Africa:

 

- Lock your doors at all times.

- Don't stop for anyone on the side of the road, I don't give a shit if they look like they need help its a lie they are going to kill you.

- Don't walk ANYWHERE at night.

- Keep your car doors locked while driving, snatch and grabs at intersections is common. Only unlock your door if they are pointing a gun at you, unless your car is bulletproof.

- Don't leave things like cellphones and wallets lying around in your car or in your house, basically nowhere visible as the sight of potential loot is a major draw to a break-in.

- Don't bother calling the police if you're white.

- DO NOT GET SENT TO PRISON YOU WILL DIE

- Pray to your god every time you get in a car, people do not give a shit about road rules, half of them bought their licenses with a six-pack of beer.

- Areas that look like a slum, STAY THE FUCK AWAY.

 

That's all I can think of right now, here's some culture for you:

 

 

Um, not all of this stuff applies everywhere in SA Pity...

 

Cape Town is mostly pretty chilled...

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Um, not all of this stuff applies everywhere in SA Pity...

 

Cape Town is mostly pretty chilled...

 

That's just what you want us to believe.

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Um, not all of this stuff applies everywhere in SA Pity...

 

Cape Town is mostly pretty chilled...

Im just shittalking haha, you are right.. The cape's are pretty chill for the most part. KZN is out of control though.

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man i'm glad i have nothing to contribute to this thread.

 

Agreed. I mean sure, I've been in a bus accident (No one died, lost my two front teeth) and been robbed a few times (Nothing violent) but it's pretty tame compared to the stuff in this thread.

 

It makes me sad to read about the bad things that have happened to other people :-/

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Im just shittalking haha, you are right.. The cape's are pretty chill for the most part. KZN is out of control though.

 

Yah, KZN and Limpopo are pretty wild west. I was actually surprised to learn recently that Joburg is no longer the crime capital of SA. They apparently cut down a lot. Now Cape Town "wins" that honour but most of the city is actually pretty decent it's just that the Cape Flats and big squatter camps are rife with gang violence.

 

I actually realised I do have one "Shit happens" story I could tell to this thread. It's not a super unpleasant story, just more weird and WTF than anything else.

 

 

Back when I was a student at UCT here in Cape Town (This was between 2002 and 2005, inclusive) I used to take the long-distance bus home to KZN. It's a reasonably long trip by SA standards (1600km, 28hour bus ride) although it doesn't compare to US distances :-)

 

Anyways, one trip back home the bus was travelling on the N2 highway around Port Elizabeth when I saw the weirdest shit in the opposite lanes. First I saw a very obviously dead body. It was roughly in the middle of the opposite lanes. A few seconds later, about 100m beyond the dead body, I saw a bakkie (SA slang term for pick-up truck) crashed into a fence by the side of the road (Again the opposite lane side of the road). The bakkie was empty but it seemed likely in retrospect that the body in the road was from the vehicle. And then, the crowning moment: About 10m past the bakkie was this farmer leaning on the fence just surveying the scene. That was it. No police, no ambulances, just this bizarre little snapshot-of-life-and-death scene. It was....bizarre.

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i wanna share my life stories but at the same time i don't

You entered this thread, you WILL contribute. Or we'll give you something to contribute. ;)

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thats good because ile be in capetown pretty much the whole time

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I've witnessed no less than nine people dying in front of my eyes, possibly more but I was not sure when they precisely died.

I was in the house when my grandfather died, and watched him get carried out.

 

It was not nearly as bad as I though it would be. The man had lived a good life, and enough people cared about him to fill a massive church to the point that people stood in the isle.

 

I only hope that the people who you watched die were even in  remotely a similar situation.

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thats good because ile be in capetown pretty much the whole time

 

Nice! Enjoy!

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Kinda awkward, but i never met my grandfathers. My grandfather on my fathers side died like 2 months after i was born. My parents just told me that he was really happy to see his first grandchild before he dies. He was 84 years old, so yeah, pretty old. My grandfather on my mothers side died 1 year before i was born , i would have been the first grandchild too. If i am thinking about it, i would have loved to met them, like the stereotypical things where your granddad tells you about how life was better when he was young and so on. Or teaches you how to drive a bike, kek.

 

Same here. I've never really felt sad about it, or missed them as I've never known any different. It makes me happy to see how much my little lad enjoys playing with my dad.

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I went to my great grandmother's funeral the other day, and the only times I felt sad were when my dad appeared in photos.

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I went to my great grandmother's funeral the other day, and the only times I felt sad were when my dad appeared in photos.

 

My grandmother is a racist homophobe that actively hates her grandchild that is a lesbian.  She didn't talk to my mother for 5 years because I was what you call an "OOPS" at my mother's age of 19.

 

Fuck the bigot generations, IMO.

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My grandmother is a racist homophobe that actively hates her grandchild that is a lesbian.  She didn't talk to my mother for 5 years because I was what you call an "OOPS" at my mother's age of 19.

 

Fuck the bigot generations, IMO.

 

My great grandma said when she moved into a retirement village "I hope they don't replace me with Asians". They told her they didn't. They actually did.

 

I thought it was pretty funny.

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My grandma is Polish and she always asked family members when they had a partner if "he/she wasn't Polish cause Polish people aren't worth shit and unreliable etc etc I know it because I am one"

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My grandmother is a racist homophobe that actively hates her grandchild that is a lesbian.  She didn't talk to my mother for 5 years because I was what you call an "OOPS" at my mother's age of 19.

 

Fuck the bigot generations, IMO.

 

Is she a rampant hypocrite too?  That was my experience with my father.  I was the last child by far.  Dad was 55 when I was born.  I figure that puts him at an age similar to most grandparents in this thread.  Born in 1925.

 

Most judgmental person I've ever known.  Quick with an insult, but absolutely incapable of taking one himself.  Loved to shove his religion in people's faces, even though he only started regularly attending church in his 60s.  Used to berate me for not having a girl under each arm at all times, but absolutely forbade premarital sex.  I was not allowed to have a girl over to the house unless it was strictly school related and supervised.  Loved to joke the he was black (he's Arabic) but took immense offense to anyone else calling him black.  

 

He nearly disowned my sister after he heard she had kissed a black guy.  

 

His disrespect toward women was astonishing.  He made the stereotypical 1950's casual sexual harassment look tame.  I have no idea how he ended up married.  Oh wait, I know exactly how.  He was 31 when he started dating my mother, who was 16 at the time.  I'll admit, I've seen the old pictures, and dad was a pretty dapper looking guy in his prime.  Poor girl didn't know any better....  She altered her birth certificate so they could get married before she turned 18.  They had 5 kids over the next 4 years (first 2 were twins.)  Slave to the family, in days before divorce was popular...

 

Mom was diagnosed with cancer a short time before I was locked up.  It got significantly worse while I was in, and she passed before I got out.  The treatments had her pretty weak at times, to the point where she couldn't move under her own power.  Years later, I found out that she had fallen off the couch one day.  After 40 years of marriage and 6 kids, my dad didn't care enough to call an ambulance, or contact a neighbor for help.  He made no effort to get help.  He left her there for hours.  He got her some food, and put the plate on the floor for her, as if she were a dog.  My sister, who eventually found her and got help, was wise enough to keep that little tale from me until dad had done us all a favor and died himself.  I think "justifiable homicide" may have worked as a defense if I learned of it earlier, but judging by past experiences in Florida, I'll probably be arrested.  I thought of killing my dad, and he eventually died.  Good enough for Florida!

 

My probation put me in a position where I had to live with him again for a time.  Came within a hair's breadth of killing him.  Often wanted to go back to prison.  Would have likely killed myself, had I worn a more narrow shoe (another story, for another time.)

 

 

 

Damn, I rambled again.  In short, yes.  Fuck the bigot generation.

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Wow, my shit seems pretty lame. I mean, it seems bad, but I'm still alive and mostly uninjured, except for some emotional scarring.

 

Got bone cancer when I was 12. The tumor was about the size of a grapefruit in my right shoulder. How it got that big without being noticed is crazy, especially since I was about 6' tall and barely 100 lbs. Had malignant potential, but didn't metastasize before it was caught. The tumor recurred 2 years later, but was caught and removed again without issue. Between 3 major surgeries, spent around 5 weeks in the hospital and ran up nearly $1.5M in medical bills. Child stuff is excessively expensive.

 

Developed epilepsy when I was 14. Have had dozens of seizures in the past 15 years. Lost a job and wrecked 4 cars due to it. They only pull my license for 6 months afterwards though. After car wrecks and general accidents, have spent about 6 weeks in hospitals and run up about $800k bills. Have been through multiple monitoring and testing sessions with no results. Unmedicated, I have 15-25 seizures per day, lasting anywhere from 2-45 minutes. Have spent about 2.5 weeks in hospitals for testing, totaling about $200k. The next step, if I decide I want to try to get more answers, is for them to cut off most of my skull so they can plug electrodes directly into my brain. Odds of that actually providing any info are slim to none. Not sure if I'm willing to do that. (This is where my name comes from - epileptic with a MMJ license)

 

Insurance companies must hate me, though they've weaseled out of paying for a good bit of the epilepsy problems by creative application of the pre-existing condition clause. I've ponied up pretty much everything I had 3 times, about $20k so far, but have just had to stiff hospitals out of about $160k. Makes me sick that the people who are doing everything they can to help are the ones getting screwed.

 

Had 3 friends commit suicide during or shortly after high-school. All 3 by guns. Had a crazy step-father who loved to wave his gun around at my mom, me, and my little sister, to 'keep us in line'. Trying to eat dinner at 8 years old while staring into the barrel of a gun is kinda difficult. We literally ran away in the middle of the night because he had threatened to kill us all. Spent the next 3 weeks living out of a Chevy Astro van after 3 churches in town said we weren't worthy of help since my mom had 2 failed marriages. Yup, a homeless single mother with an 8yo son and a 5yo daughter, "not worthy of help". Yes, I'm a crazy anti-gun/anti-religion leftist nut.

 

But hey, I have a job that pays the bills, own a house, and am still alive. Can't complain too much.

 

Would be nice to get laid though. Haven't had any meaningful contact with a woman in over 7 years. That's probably what screws with my psyche the most.

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spent around 5 weeks in the hospital and ran up nearly $1.5M in medical bills. 

 

 

Have spent about 2.5 weeks in hospitals for testing, totaling about $200k.

 

. I've ponied up pretty much everything I had 3 times, about $20k so far, but have just had to stiff hospitals out of about $160k.

 

 

Seriously. Fuck the US health system.

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The only people who think the US healthcare system actually works are the people who have never had to use it.

Military healthcare works pretty well, but has the advantage of people with conditions like this not being allowed in to begin with. If they develop big issues, they are medically retired and sent to civilian health care, but it's paid for by the military. It works on the small scale, but there's no way a system like that is feasible for the entire population.

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Would be nice to get laid though. Haven't had any meaningful contact with a woman in over 7 years. That's probably what screws with my psyche the most.

 

Not trying to sound condescending, but if you can afford to go a bit beyond paying the bills, it's certainly possible to get...  professional help for that desire.  I attach no stigma to that, and freely admit that I've hired more than a few escorts in my travels.  

 

Seriously. Fuck the US health system.

 

 

As someone who works within (but not directly for) the health system, I both wholeheartedly agree and disagree.  It's a horrible bit of circular reasoning.  Hospitals have to offer a certain amount of care to anyone who walks in, whether they can pay or not.  Many procedures seriously do cost a lot of money.  In order to stay solvent, they need to charge the fuck out of everyone, knowing that they'll only ever collect from... maybe 60%?  They damn sure inflate the bills when they know a patient is insured.  This drives insurance rates up.  This means more uninsured people.  Uninsured people don't willingly go to the doctor for routine checkups or other minor things.  This leaves them more vulnerable to major issues later, which they cannot afford to pay, which feeds back into the original problem...

 

Meanwhile, I don't pay for insurance.  Work offers a good policy.  They even cover 75% of the premium.  I'm just too much of a greedy ass to let them take money from me, and the tax penalty for being uninsured is still a good bit less than the cost of carrying insurance.  I love the concept of universal healthcare, but I don't want to sacrifice any of my own income to fund it...  and I'm not alone in that line of thinking.  And that's one reason that we can't have nice things.  

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The only people who think the US healthcare system actually works are the people who have never had to use it.

You should try the mental health care system, take regular one and make it 3 times worse and take even longer 

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Well i almost punched a fellow high school student to death because he was picking on some girls i was friends with,

i also pushed a cop and his pistol discharged shoting him in the feet

i also witnessed someone jumping infront of a train

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